


Lord, Give Me Grace and Dancing Feet

by kiath



Category: Lord of the Rings RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-11-15
Updated: 2008-11-15
Packaged: 2017-10-30 09:19:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/330178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kiath/pseuds/kiath
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dom is set up on a blind date with Elijah six months after the end of his previous relationship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lord, Give Me Grace and Dancing Feet

**Author's Note:**

> _Thanks to kyuuketsukirui for the beta._

_**September.** _

'You're wasting your time,' Dominic says, angling his dick so he's pissing right onto the urinal cake. It's strangely satisfying to get a direct hit. 'He's not my type.'

Billy's not listening. Billy's too busy eyeing up the guy next to him. 

Bloody Billy.

Dominic shakes off, tucks himself back into his jeans and walks towards the hand basins, carefully buttoning up his fly as he goes. The water from the tap is too hot and he dips his hands in and out of the stream, wincing each time, before quickly giving up and drying them on his thighs. Billy appears beside him, leaning forward and squinting at himself in the mirror. 

'I found a grey hair yesterday. In my _eyebrow_. Can you believe it?'

Leaning forward to inspect himself a little closer as well, Dominic snorts. 'Old codger. Maybe you're going deaf, too.'

'What?'

'I said, you're wasting your time. He's not my type, you know.'

Billy snorts and continues peering at his reflection. 'Don't be ridiculous. He has a dick, doesn't he?'

'I have _some_ standards!'

'Bollocks,' Billy replies, sniffing as he straightens up. 'You haven't shagged anyone since what's-his-face dumped you. It's illegal for you to have standards at this point; you _need_ to get laid. How long has it been? Six months? It's embarrassing, Dom.'

Dominic sees a couple of guys at the urinals glance over their shoulders before smirking at one another. 'Jesus, Bill, keep your fucking voice down,' he hisses, stalking towards the toilet door and yanking it open.

'I'm right, though. For the love of Christ, Dom, you don't have to fall in love with him - just _shag_ him.'

*

Dominic frowns at his drink. The ice in his Bulmers has started to melt and it's making the cider taste watery and cheap. He takes a couple of mouthfuls anyway. His rarely acknowledged politeness complex is stopping him from telling his blind date to just fuck off home, and it means getting pissed is the only way he's going to get through the night. 

Elijah is smiling at him. It seems he's always fucking smiling. It's a tight little grin, pinched at the corners, and despite it (or maybe because of it) Dominic suspects Elijah is feeling the awkward atmosphere just as much. Good. Maybe that way he'll take the hint and sod off sooner rather than later. 

'So... what do you do for a living, Dom?'

Dominic hates Billy just a little harder. 'I work at a dog's home. A shelter, thing.'

'Oh!' Elijah beams at that, showing a row of gappy, square teeth. Dominic cringes inside but can't look away. It's like a dental car-crash. 'That's so cool. So, like, you look after the dogs?'

'No, I get rid of the ones we put down. The dead bodies.' 

Elijah's smile falters, and he narrows his eyes a little, like he's not sure if Dominic's joking or not. Dominic _is_ joking, of course; most of the day he just shovels crap out of the cages and makes sure his charges are fed and watered. He feels a tiny twinge of guilt for putting Elijah in such an awkward position and it instantly gets the better of him. 

'What about you?'

Elijah's smile changes yet again, back to awkward. His eyes drop to the table and he makes a little 'hem' noise before answering. 'I... Well, I'm a model... but I do a little acting, too. I don't want to model forever. It's just to pay the rent, you know?'

Dominic barely holds back a laugh. 'You model? Really?!'

Elijah misses a beat before answering. 'I know, right? It's not really what I dreamt of doing as a kid...'

There it is again - the guilt. There's the stain of a blush showing on Elijah's cheeks and his eyes are still fixed on the table. If Dominic didn't feel so bad for mocking him, he'd be grateful - Elijah's ginormous eyeballs are as unappealing as his teeth. 

Dominic takes another swig of his drink and looks away.

He's going to kill Billy. 

*

_**October.** _

The rain is pelting down. Dominic watches people run past in both directions and feels smug that he decided to grab his umbrella on the way out. He's not often organised enough to consider something that practical. 

Billy's late - half an hour, no less. He's usually so punctual, and he's not answering his mobile. Wanker. Dominic wishes fiercely he had opted to be in charge of getting the tickets for the gig, that way he could just leave Billy's at the box office and get out of the downpour. 

His trainers are soaked through either way. Dominic knows he's not going to enjoy the gig as much now, not with damp feet. Stupid Billy. Stupid bloody fucking...

'Hey.'

Oh. Oh, Dominic isn't just going to kill Billy, he's going to rip him limb from limb and then feed him to the dogs at the kennels. 

Elijah's soaking wet. His hair is plastered to his head and his clothes are clearly several shades darker than they should be. He's shivering. 

He's also smiling. A stupid, hopeful, eager-to-please smile, gappy teeth all on display and big, googly eyes peering right at Dominic. 'I'm sorry I'm so late. I missed the bus, so I decided to walk, and then it started to rain, so now I'm soaked through and...' He pauses, looking a bit embarrassed. 'And... it doesn't matter why I'm late, does it? I'm really sorry. I hope-'

'Where's Billy?' Dominic can't be bothered with pleasantries. He just wants to know exactly _how_ dead Billy is. Next-time-I-see-you dead, or I'm-coming-over-right-now dead. 

'He didn't tell you?' Elijah wipes a hand over his forehead and pushes back the hair plastered to it. It sticks up at several strange angles and makes him look even more dishevelled, if that was even possible. 'He's not feeling so good and he offered me his ticket. I love this band. Did you know it sold out in, like, five-'

'He's not coming?'

Elijah shakes his head. 'No...' 

'And you've come in his place?'

'Um. Yeah.'

Dominic sets his jaw. 'Well, that's just bloody brilliant, isn't it?'

'Look, Dom... if this is weird for you we don't have to watch the show together. Here-' Elijah pulls the tickets out of his pocket and offers one to Dominic. They're so wet they tear. 'Shit. Okay. Here's your ticket. We'll go and watch the show separately and go home. No hard feelings.'

Dominic looks at the soggy piece of paper and then back at Elijah's face. He's clearly trying not to look hurt; there's that tight smile again. He's shivering even harder now. Dominic is absolutely certain he's going to kill Billy tomorrow. Not tonight, though. 

'Come on, let's get inside before we miss the fucking thing altogether.'

*

'You'll ruin your jeans.'

Elijah looks up at Dominic and grins, gapped-teeth and all. 'They were already ruined.'

Dominic's not hard when Elijah pulls his dick free of his jeans. He _is_ pleasantly drunk though, a beer blanket wrapped around his entire body, and he watches passively as Elijah opens his mouth and wraps his lips around the flaccid penis in his hand. Dominic only fully realises he himself is the owner of said penis when a familiar feeling curls in his stomach and warms him in a different way.

He hums gently to himself and stares out of their alcove, a damp doorway in an equally damp alley, a few streets from the venue. A rat scuttles out from a pile of bin bags opposite and disappears into the darkness. Dominic closes his eyes as Elijah sucks a little harder, working his hand where his mouth can't reach. It's been a long while, such a long while. 

Threading his fingers into Elijah's hair, he encourages a steady, careful rhythm. Not too hard, no pushing, no pushiness... just a _yes, yes please, yes more_ , making it clear that it's good, and wanted, at least right now. Right at this moment, it's wanted.

'Elijah, I-' He stutters, pulling on Elijah's hair a little, trying to warn. Elijah understands and clambers to his feet, mouth replaced by hand alone, cold air replaced by mouth. Dominic kisses back as he comes, gasping and twitching against Elijah's lips. 

When he opens his eyes again he sees the glisten of come on Elijah's fingers. Elijah wipes it idly down his jeans - already ruined, why not? - and grins. 

'Call me.'

*

_**November.** _

Dominic doesn't call Elijah. Why would he do anything of the sort? Yes, fine, the blowjob was all well and good, but it didn't alter the fundamental fact that, Elijah? Just not Dominic's type. 

That said, he _had_ turned out to be a bit of a laugh at the gig. He knew all the words and sang along with gusto, cheering and whooping at the end of each song. It bordered on embarrassing, before somehow inexplicably swinging towards infectious after a few drinks. For his part, Dominic kept the beers flowing, taking money from Elijah when it was his round to ensure he didn't miss any of the gig. This little kindness was Dominic's atonement for being quite such a dickhead earlier, and Elijah seemed happy to... well, _forgive_ afterwards.

Whatever. 

As it happens, Dominic doesn't need to call, since an awkward chance meeting at a club and a little alcoholic influence is all it takes for Dominic to find himself flat on his back in Elijah's bed, one part confused, three parts joyfully fucked.

'What happened?' 

Elijah stretches his arms over his head and arches his back, humming with satisfaction. 'Just now?'

'Just... in general. I swear I was absolutely determined _not_ to end up shagging you tonight.'

'Oh yeah?'

'Yeah.' Dominic looks over at Elijah and scowls. 'I don't fancy you. I really don't. You're not my type.'

Elijah stares back at him, eyebrows raised, failing to suppress an amused smirk. 'I'm not your type, huh?'

'No. No way. I said to Billy, not my type. Right from the start.'

'So, uh, tell me...' Elijah shifts onto his side, propping his head on his hand. 'Bearing in mind what just happened here, with us, in this bed. With you, and me, and the, y'know, the sex an' all, I gotta ask: what do you do for the ones who _are_ your type?'

Dominic scowls even harder. 'You weren't this much of a smartarse when we met, you know.' 

Elijah flops onto his back and snorts. 'Just for the record, you've always been this much of a prick.'

*

_**December.** _

It takes five weeks for Elijah's path to cross Dominic's again, thanks to Dominic's twin stealthy plans of Not Calling Elijah and Not Seeing That Traitor Billy Either. But despite the best laid plans, Dominic eventually finds himself sharing precious bar space with, disgusting but true, the best lay he's had in a long, long time. Life is so cruel sometimes.

'Hey, Dominic! How's it hanging?'

Dominic keeps his gaze on the barman nearest, not wanting to break eye-contact lest his turn for service be missed. 'How's it hanging? Jesus, Elijah, did anyone tell you it's not 1996 anymore?'

Elijah just laughs, a ridiculous noise that puts Dominic's teeth on edge. 'Merry Christmas to you, too.'

It isn't the last time Elijah offers an irritating festive greeting that night. Dominic watches him wish several prospective suitors the very best, two of them armed with mistletoe like utter desperadoes. Sad, sad, sad. Downing the last of his JD, Dominic watches Elijah kiss one, and then the other, both for far too long and - for God's sake - with far too much tongue. When the mistletoe boys make their way towards Dominic, they barely even give him a cursory glance and keep on moving. He sneers at their retreating forms and orders another drink. Like he'd snog either of them anyway.

The extra whisky soothes Dominic enough to forget Elijah's little display and instead recognise a few familiar signals from one of the bar staff, a decent-enough looking bloke with overlong black hair and a tempting pout. Fifteen minutes later, Dominic follows his timely distraction's directions around to the back of the pub, intending to use the barman's ten minute break from work wisely. Instead, he finds himself watching Elijah getting an enthusiastic blowjob from one of the mistletoe boys, feeling an altogether unpleasant stab of jealousy. It was _his_ plan! Dominic was supposed to be the one getting blown, and that little freak had not only stolen his idea, he was also making Dominic watch it getting played out. 

Dominic is so caught up in his fury, he absolutely does not notice that Elijah looks oddly hot half-lit by the bulb hanging over the pub's back entrance, eyes closed, mouth open, his little gasps condensing in the chilly night air. He even looks good with those weird eyes open; even more so now he's smiling back at Dominic...

Fuck! _Fuck_. Dominic turns on his heel and stalks back the way he came, cheeks burning despite the cold, dick uncomfortably hard in his suddenly uncomfortably tight trousers, shaking a little from the utterly unexpected new brand of jealousy he feels. 

But if Elijah thinks Dominic would call him just because of that, he has another think coming, that's for sure. 

Bastard. 

*

_**January.** _

'Dominic! What a surprise. How are you?'

Dominic sighs, a little defeated. 'Drunk.' Damn. That isn't cool. True, though. 

Elijah chuckles on the other end of the line. 'Oh yeah? And what have I done to deserve you calling at this hour?'

'Wanna fuck?' 

There's a slight pause in which Dominic contemplates what the hell he thought he was doing, dialing Elijah's number like that. This is not the way he wants to spend the first day of the new year. Frankly, he doesn't want to start _any_ day begging for sex. But here he is regardless, making it quite clear that he's absolutely fucking desperate. Wonderful. The silence on the line is filled not a moment too soon by another soft laugh. 

' _You're_ giving _me_ a booty call?'

'I guess so...'

Elijah hums a little. 'How drunk _are_ you exactly? I mean, if I come over, are you going to be passed out in your own puke already? Can you even get it up?'

'I'm- Jesus, yes, I can get it up,' Dominic insists, instinctively sliding his right hand beneath the waistband of his boxers and grasping his soft penis. Truth is, he isn't actually sure if he can right now. 

'Are you hard now?' Elijah drops his voice to a silky purr. 'Touch yourself... I want to be sure.' Dominic is disgusted to hear a pathetic noise come out of his own mouth. 

'You can't just come over and do it for me? C'mon, Elijah, just come over and fuck me. Please?'

Elijah laughs. 'Okay, okay. You're lucky it's my New Year's Resolution to be kinder to the needy. Give me half an hour. And Dominic?'

'Yeah?'

'Are you hard yet?'

Dominic grins and allows himself a small laugh. 'Yeah...'

'Don't you dare jerk off before I arrive.'

*

_**February.** _

Dominic watches idly as Elijah's mouth makes its way across his stomach. 'Elijah?'

Elijah replies with a nip of his teeth and a vague humming noise. 

'Do you want to go out sometime?'

That gets his attention. Looking up, Elijah smiles curiously. 'Like, on a date?'

'Sure. A date.'

'No, but thanks.' Elijah strokes Dominic's tummy with the end of his nose and then drags a wet line along the skin with his tongue. 

Dominic is officially taken aback. He watches Elijah nuzzle his way down to a hipbone, not sure how to take his answer. 'You... _don't_ want to go on a date with me?'

'No, not really. Turn over.'

Doing as he's told, Dominic winces a little as Elijah bites hard on his backside. 'Ow!'

'Sorry. You've got a great ass, you know that?'

'Um, thanks. Look, I don't want to dwell on this, but... why?'

'It's just so _grabable_. I just wanna grab it and f-'

Dominic is rapidly losing both his patience and his hard-on. 'Not my bum, you twat! Why won't you come on a date with me?'

'We have to discuss this now?' Elijah sighs heavily against Dominic's skin.

'Yes!' 

'We can't just have sex again?'

'No!'

'Jeez. Okay. It's just not a good idea - we've been on one date, and you were a horrible, horrible person to spend time with. It was a disaster.'

Dominic twists a little so he can look at Elijah over his shoulder. 'Not true! What about the gig? The gig was fun!'

'That was _not_ a date,' Elijah argues back. 'And even if it was, that was a terrible night. You made me feel awful for being there, got really drunk and only spoke to me again because I give fantastic head.'

'Not true!'

'Oh yeah?'

'Well, all right, it's sort of true,' Dominic concedes. 'But just for the record, you're not the oral sex champion you think you are. It's not fantastic; it's just _pretty good_. You give _above average_ head.'

Elijah laughs and slaps Dominic hard on one buttock before reaching for the condoms. 'Attaboy.'

*

_**March.** _

Dominic turns his mobile phone over and over in his hands, staring out of the cafe window. Elijah is late. Actually, he isn't late - he's _really fucking_ late. He's already kept Dominic waiting fifty minutes and isn't answering his phone. Pressing a button on the keypad and lighting up the screen, Dominic stares at the picture of Elijah he'd set as his background image a couple of weeks back. They'd spent almost the whole weekend in bed together, and in the winter sunshine of the Sunday morning, Dominic had reached for his phone and snapped a picture of Elijah lying beside him. Sunday-Morning Elijah smiles back at him now, thoroughly innocent and offering no clues as to where he is or why he's late. 

Ten more minutes, Dominic tells himself. Ten more minutes and he'll definitely leave. 

Twenty minutes later, Elijah strolls into the cafe and sits beside Dominic. 'Hey. Sorry I'm late, something came up.'

'That's okay.' It isn't okay. Dominic has no idea why he said that. It really isn't okay in the slightest. But instead of asking why he's been left waiting for well over an hour like a chump, Dominic just smiles. Truth is, he's pathetically happy to see Elijah. 'Do you want a drink? I've already had a couple of cups of tea, but I could have ano-'

'Actually, no. Can we just talk instead?'

'Sure. What about?'

Elijah winces a little. 'Well, us. Look, I don't want to string you along. The thing is... it's not working for me, Dom. I'm not sure we should see each other anymore.'

Dominic's eyebrows shoot up and his stomach drops. 'Are you breaking up with me? Are you seriously breaking up with me?'

'Yeah, I guess. I mean, we weren't really ever together, but-' Elijah sits forward and fixes Dominic with a wide-eyed expression. 'But I just want you to know it's not you, it's me.'

'Bullshit. Give me the real reason.' Not wanting to look at Elijah's face, Dominic grabs a hold of his mug of tea and takes a swig. It's been cold for ages, and he barely manages to hide his grimace. 

'Okay... it _is_ you. It's been really fun the last few weeks, but the truth is you're just not really my type.'

If he was looking for a killer break-up line, Dominic is sure Elijah's found it. 'Not your _type_? Are you shitting me?'

'No...'

'We've been shagging each other for two fucking months, and you only realise _now_ I'm not your type?'

'Look, you're great in bed and I've had a lot of fun with you, but we're never going to work out longterm. We're just so...' Elijah waves his hands around, as if that's going to help bring on the sympathetic platitudes. 'Different.'

'Of course we're different! Isn't that what's made it fun?'

'The truth is, Dom, you're too mean. I found it kind of hot to begin with, in a weird way, but now I just want to be with someone... _nice_. I want to be with someone I want to date, not just have sex with. You're just not boyfriend material, at least not for me.'

With his jaw hanging open and incredulity clouding his brain, Dominic knows he should be defending himself. _I tried to be nice to you! I tried to be nice, and you told me to sod off!_ All he actually manages is a weak sounding, 'But I actually really like you. I didn't like you at all, and you _made_ me like you. And now I'm sat here like a twat, getting dumped.'

Elijah can only shrug and pull an apologetic expression. 'I know. And I'm sorry. Look, I have to go. I really am sorry, though.' Standing up, he bends and gives Dominic a quick kiss on the forehead. 'I'll see you around, Dom.'

Five minutes after Elijah leaves, Dominic finally finds enough wits to pick up his phone. He stares at the smiling background picture for a minute, before scrolling through his options and changing it for one of a kitten next to a brightly-coloured beachball. He fucking hates that kitten, but at least he isn't going to see a charming gap-toothed grin and disarmingly pretty blue eyes every time he picks the damn thing up from now on.

Clicking back to the main menu, Dominic types a brief text message and sends it to Billy. 

_I'm going to kill you._


End file.
